(A bit of a rambling post)
I feel like a new man……
Not me……just something a particular resident says after he has a hair cut.
Says he feels good – more like my old self
And he looks like one too – making the effort to stand straighter – taller as well.
And if a particular female resident is in the salon at the same time (which occasionally happens) she laughs and says ‘if he’s got a friend- I’ll have one too’
On my mind at the moment is that for years when you thought or spoke about aged care/nursing homes they always seemed to be full of elderly women – they were the ones who seemed to need them. After all, they were the ones who lived much longer. Not any more! .
Men are living longer, ways of life are changing, family attitudes to parents living with children definitely seems to have changed, so when health deteriorates more and more of them are finding it necessary to use these services – to enter residential care
Most seem to settle in quite well (the ones I’ve had contact with anyway) – and in little ways are encouraged to think of it as their home (which it now is) and continue with ‘the familiar’ while they come to terms with the move. There are many more male support workers than before, male carers definitely help during that settling in time.
One gentleman has a daily newspaper delivered with his name written prominently on the front. It goes with him everywhere, is read cover to cover plus crossword and other puzzles are completed, then is reread.
Another is given the racing guide from another daily paper so he can study the form. No bets are placed though he can tell you the form and race history of horses been and gone (sadly not current ones because whatever he reads in the paper isn’t retained).
Another wears a high viz vest or fleecy every day……..he had worked in construction and wore one every day. His ‘hard hat’ lives on a shelf in his room but has been known to be paraded round the common areas…..on his head!.
.
Old habits seem to linger with some. One elderly gentleman with very shaky legs tries to stand when female staff are nearby. Or when he’s accompanied to his room indicates for the female to go through the door before him.
Meal times are interesting- in the household I’ve had most contact with many of them are able to come to the dining area and eat together at ‘the men’s table’…..almost like safety in numbers preferring male company……..although there are others seated at mixed tables.
They chat contently to each other referring to each other by their given names…. ..except for a retired medical specialist who they refer to as Mr S…..because one told me ‘he deserves respect, he’s lost so much’.
They have a way of joshing with one chap, an ex serviceman who on occasion has trouble walking – his feet scuff – so you’ll often hear them saying ‘ hup 234, come on, lift those feet, get moving’. And more often than not it works
Thankfully many haven’t lost their competitive nature, it still comes out. Especially when simple hand/eye coordination ‘games’ are played. It’s very evident when toss the ping pong ball over the table and into the ice cream container as well as seated balloon badminton (over a portable net) are on the program. There might be teams involved but there is also personal pride at being able to get that ball in the container as well as bat that balloon over the net.
Of course there are those for whom this move is not welcomed, they retire to their rooms, are not receptive to any encouragement- their deteriorating health means they need to be there….but in many cases their mind doesn’t want to.
Still Waters 