Category Archives: All things fun

Come laugh with me…

All things fun

It’s coming to the end of a rather warm January
We’ve had Summer days galore plus (courtesy of living in Melbourne)
some cool to cold ones as well as the odd thunderstorm thrown in for good luck.

And because it’s Friday – a Funday – I’m in need of some Jokes

Let’s just say that PC or not I never tire of the Blonde ones
So today I have a few more for you
They’re not new, you may have heard some of them before, some you may not
Whatever way – Enjoy

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Two blondes were walking down the road and the first blonde said, “Look at that dog with one eye!”
The other blonde covers one of her eyes and says, “Where?”

*****

The executive was interviewing a young blonde for a position in his company
He wanted to find out something about her personality so he asked
“If you could have a conversation with any person, living or dead, who would that be?”
The blonde quickly responded

“The living one.”

******

A girl was visiting her blonde friend who had acquired two new dogs.
The girl asked what their names were.
The blonde responded by saying
that one was named Rolex
and this one was named Timex.
Her friend said, ‘whoever heard of someone naming their dogs like that?
HELLLOOOOOO….. answered the blonde.

They’re watch dogs!

******

A blonde was playing Trivial Pursuit
It came to her turn
She rolled the dice and landed on Science and Nature.
Her question was, “If you were in a vacuum and someone calls your name,
can you hear it?”
She thought for a time and then asked,

‘Is it on or off?’

******

So as I’ve said before making fun of the Irish and Blondes doesn’t bother me
you all know my background
and at one time of my life – in my much younger days – I ‘was‘ a blonde 😊

Fun Friday – the day you put all the worries of the week behind you

Just for the fun of it….

All things fun

The ‘silly season’ appears to be over …the Christmas and New Year eating and drinking in excess festivities have finished and life will soon return to how it was before.

But before the year proper begins here’s a little bit of fun in the form of
Did you know:–

  • That the yucky feeling you get from overindulging has a name – crapulence’.
    I kid you not – feeling like crap is a real thing….. https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/crapulent
  • The metal cage (that wire contraption) on the champagne bottle (or sparkling wine as we have to call it here in Australia) that thing that confuses many people is called ‘agraffe’ and does actually have a purpose. Basically it’s to hold the cork in….https://glossary.wein.plus/agraffe

If you draw the short straw and it’s your job to ‘pop the bubbly’ here’s how to do it.

And while you were there your scholarly child brings you school work to look at – seemingly it’s about things called ‘glabella’ and ‘columella nasi’

Plus ‘digitus minimus’ as well as the ‘vagitus’. of a new born baby
….but you can’t read it because it’s written in ‘griffonage’.
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I’m wondering if there’s a word for the fact that I hadn’t noticed this mural before.
I saw it in November (when I took this photo) but didn’t remember seeing it before
Seemingly…it was painted a month prior to the last time I parked there….in July.
Possibly ‘unobservant’ is the one I’m looking for!
https://www.collinsdictionary.com/dictionary/english/unobservant

Hello sweetie….

All things fun

We have an ad on tv at the moment featuring an awkward moment in a life drawing class when a student discovers his mother is the live (naked) model.

That came to mind when I saw this

Also struck me as funny topically because at the moment we’re all undressing (or maybe have already undressed) our Christmas trees.
Wouldn’t it be good if they could do it all by themselves 😊

Fun Friday – the day you forget the worries of the week.

Today is….

All things fun, All things music

I’ve a feeling I might have posted this before but I couldn’t let today go by without a rerun. Be patient, read my little joke and I’ll tell you what ‘today is’ at the end

A tourist in Vienna is going through a graveyard and all of a sudden he hears music.
No one is around, so he starts searching for the source.

He finally locates the origin and finds it is coming from a grave with a headstone that reads: “Ludwig van Beethoven, 1770- 1827”.

Then he realizes that the music is Beethoven’s Ninth Symphony and it is being played backwards

Puzzled, he leaves the graveyard and persuades a friend to return with him.

By the time they arrive back at the grave the music has changed.
This time it is the Seventh Symphony, and like the previous piece, it is being played backwards.

Curious, the men agree to consult a music scholar.
When they return with the expert, the Fifth Symphony is playing – backwards.

The expert notices that the symphonies are being played in the reverse order in which they were composed,
The 9th, then the 7th, then the 5th.

By the next day the word has spread, and a crowd has gathered around the grave.
They are all listening to the Second Symphony being played backward.
Just then the graveyard’s caretaker ambles up to the group.

Someone in the group asks him if he has an explanation for the music.
“I would have thought it was obvious,” the caretaker says.

“He’s decomposing.”

~ ~ ~ ~

Source

Interesting article about Ludwig van Beethoven

Born this day 16 December 1770 – Ludwig van Beethoven

Fun Friday – the day you forget the worries of the week.

Smile……

All things fun

Smile – form one’s features into a pleased, kind, or amused expression, typically with the corners of the mouth turned up and the front teeth exposed. source

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I’m not smiling this week…
‘nursing’ someone who should have known better and has been quite ill with covid
doesn’t garner smiles
Wondering if you will be and trying hard not to become infected doesn’t either
(Little reading + commenting on posts, acknowledging comments – no go this week)

Fun Friday – the day you forget the worries of the week.

Q is for…..

All things fun

Sue at My Quiet Life in Suffolk is writing about letters of the alphabet and was questioning how she could use certain letters. That reminded me of a fun post I made on an old defunct blog.
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It’s Friday again and the letter of the week is Q
The most rarely used letter in the modern English language
source

Thinking cap on for a long time this week ~ the word of the day is ……..
Questions

About the Alphabet !


Q: In what way are the letter “A” and “noon” alike?
A: Both of them are in the middle of the “day”.

Q: What letter of the alphabet is an insect?
A: B. (bee)

Q: What letter is a body of water?
A: C. (sea)

Q: What letter is a part of the head?
A: I. (eye)

Q: What letter is a drink?
A: T. (tea)

Q: What letter is a vegetable?
A: P. (pea)

Q: What letter is an exclamation?
A: O. (oh!)

Q: What letter is looking for answers ?
A: Y. (why)

Q: What four letters frighten a thief?
A: O.I.C.U. (Oh I see you!)

Q: In what way can the letter “A” help a deaf lady?
A: It can make “her” “hear”.

Q: Which is the loudest vowel?
A: The letter “I”. It is always in the midst of noise

Q: Why is “U” the happiest letter?
A: Because it is in the middle of “fun”.

Q: What is the end of everything?
A: The letter “g”.

Just a few things to think about over the weekend.
Do you have any to add to the list??

Dirty Deeds Done at Woolworths

All things fun

(Surprises galore when I discovered a ‘joke’ folder inside another folder…… I don’t think I’ve posted this one before)

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So, here’s the story……..

Tired of constantly being broke & stuck in an unhappy marriage, a young husband decided to solve both problems by taking out a large insurance policy on his wife with himself as the beneficiary

He then started arranging to have her killed.

A ‘friend of a friend’ put him in touch with a nefarious dark-side underworld figure who went by the name of ‘Artie.’

Artie then explained to the husband that his going price for snuffing out a spouse was $5,000.

The husband said he was willing to pay that amount, but that he wouldn’t have any cash on hand until he could collect his wife’s insurance money.

Artie insisted on being paid at least something up front, so the man opened his wallet displaying the single dollar bill that rested inside. 

Artie sighed, rolled his eyes, & reluctantly agreed to accept the dollar as down payment for the dirty deed.

A few days later, Artie followed the man’s wife to the local Woolworths store.

There he surprised her in the produce department & proceeded to strangle her with his gloved hands.

As the poor unsuspecting woman drew her last breath & slumped to the floor the manager of that department stumbled unexpectedly onto the murder scene.

Unwilling to leave any living witnesses behind Artie had no choice but to strangle the produce manager as well.

However, unknown to Artie, the entire proceedings were captured by the hidden security cameras & observed by the store’s security guard who immediately called the police.

Artie was caught & arrested before he could even leave the store.

Under intense questioning at the police station Artie revealed the whole sordid plan, including his unusual financial arrangements with the hapless husband who was also quickly arrested.

The next day in the newspaper, the headline declared….

(You’re going to hate me for this…).
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.

‘ARTIE CHOKES 2 for $1.00 AT WOOLWORTHS!’

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Just a little bit of fun this Friday – to help you forget the worries of the week.

Will be back on Monday – see you then!

A slight misunderstanding…..

All things, All things fun,

Many years ago (1972) not long after we arrived in Australia we were asked to a BBQ.  BYO, the neighbour said, oh and bring a plate.  Now I knew BYO meant bring your own drinks but being a new chum was mystified by ‘bring a plate’.

Some of the groups I belonged to previously (usually young wives/mums groups) had met in members homes and we were often asked to bring cups and plates to help out at morning coffee or supper time because in those days not many young families had oodles of crockery or cutlery,

So you can guess what we did the day of the BBQ – yes, we each turned up holding an empty plate – not a skerrick of food on them.  Now if the neighbour had mentioned ‘shared food or potluck’ I’d have known what to do. Meat and salads or a sweet to share would have come along with us.

  • Meanings and origins of Australian words and idioms
    Bring a Plate
    An invitation to bring a plate of food to share at a social gathering or fundraiser. There are many stories of new arrivals in Australia being bamboozled by the instruction to bring a plate. As the locals know, a plate alone will not do. In earlier days the request was often ladies a plate, sometimes followed by gentlemen a donation (to the bar…understood) First recorded in the 1920s source

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There was a big grin on my face the day I first heard this joke
Remembering the day of the empty plates 😊

The Blonde Cowboy

A Sheriff in a small town in Texas walks out into the street and sees a blonde haired cowboy coming towards him with nothing on but his cowboy hat, his gun and his boots.

He arrests him for indecent exposure. 
As he is locking him up he asks, ‘Why in the world are you walking around llike this?’

The cowboy says, ‘Well it’s like this Sheriff…

I was in this bar down the road and this pretty little red head asks me to go out to her motor home with her….

So I did.

We go inside and she pulls off her top and asks me to pull off my shirt….

So I did.

Then she pulls off her skirt and asks me to pull off my pants…

So I did.

Then she pulls off her panties and asks me to pull off my shorts….

So I did.

Then she gets on the bed and looks at me kind of sexy and says…

‘Now go to town cowboy’

*

*

‘And here I am!’

Bring a plate – Go to town….
Oh yes, it’s all in the understanding and interpretation of the words
Have you ever misunderstood the words??

Winter Day10

All things fun,

I need to end this cold wet week we’ve had in Melbourne with a little fun

So for those who would prefer my word count to be minimal here’s a little poem I found on the internet many years ago. It’s words still ring true today

‘ WINTER ‘ 

By Abigail Elizabeth McIntyre 

Shit 

It’s Cold 

The End

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Fun Friday – the day you forget the worries of the week.

Will be back on Monday…….

See you then!

And the answer is….

All things fun

When I first saw these I was like….oh these are fun

They were cropping up everywhere

And yes my answers were 1 4 & 3 because, as you know, gravity and all that

But ’others’ were coming up with different answers and then the penny clicked

Yam was almost there……you must look more closely at the diagrams

Not 1 what about 2

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Same here – not 4 possibly 9

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Count 3 out on this one – could be 6

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However…did you notice?

  • 1 4 & 3 are blocked at the entrance – BUT so are 2 9 & 6 (see the tips of their ‘pipes’) all of those cups will stay empty. Which means the tanks on the left fill and the liquid rises to flow right.
  • 4 7 & 7 look to be the first answers but….they’re all blocked as well.
  • And so is 8 in the water puzzle
  • Which leaves 3 5 & 9 as the winners