Paddy and his mate Murphy

I’ve been trying to put another post together from our time in Mount Suprise earlier in the year and do you think I can get those photos to load 😦

SO

I’ve given up and will try again tomorrow but to take away all this angst I really feel we some need some fun time again – time for jokes – and you all know which ones are my favourite ones 🙂

An old Irish farmer’s dog goes missing and he’s inconsolable.
His wife says “Why don’t you put an advert in the paper?”
He does, but two weeks later the dog is still missing.
“What did you put in the paper Paddy?” his wife asks.
“Here boy” he replies.

Paddy spies a letter lying on his doormat.
It says on the envelope, “DO NOT BEND”.
So Paddy spends the next 2 hours – trying to figure out how to pick the bloody thing up!!

Paddy shouts frantically into the phone, ‘My wife is pregnant and her contractions are only two minutes apart!’
Is this her first child? asks the Doctor.
No  shouts Paddy, this is her husband!

Paddy was driving home drunk as a skunk, suddenly he has to swerve to avoid a tree, then another and then another.
A police car pulls him over as he veers about all over the road.
Paddy tells the cop about all the trees in the road.
Cop says “For gods sake Paddy, that’s your air freshener swinging
about!

Paddy’s in jail.
The guard looks in his cell and sees him hanging by his feet.
“What the hell you doing? he asks.
“Hanging myself,” Paddy replies.
“It should be around your neck,” says the Guard.
“I know,” says Paddy, “but I couldn’t breathe”.

And heres a good one to finish on.

Paddy and Murphy go for a day of fishing – when they get to the bridge they
realize they have forgotten their equipment.
So Murphy comes up with an idea.
“Paddy you hold me by the ankles over the bridge and when I see a fish I’ll grab
it”.
So Paddy hangs him over the side.
All of a sudden Murphy shouts “Paddy, pull me up quick”
Paddy asks “why Murphy, have you caught a fish?”
“No Paddy” Murphy replies “there’s a train coming!!

See you tomorrow
Cathy

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